Burnt

Slept for 5 hours plus today. The longest sleep in 3 weeks time? I cant remember.

There is only 1 left, one very last but tough Pharmacy Practice paper for me which require a lot of reading and general knowledge. And i am terribly sucks in  this. And then i am done for Sem 5!  Can you believe this? As in 5 subjects in 3 months time. You are gonna be kidding me.

I think i might gain weight in this month, exam period. And WTF i care about it. Huhuhuhhu

Pre-exam symptoms
-Oat with 3 Nutella bread,cereal bar,and milo/coffee for breakfast. And within one hour during the exam my stomach start rambles and scout for food.
-Cook for 3 days food in one time. And microwave / heat it for lunch and dinner. Okay, i know this is very very not healthy.
-It is 2/3 in the midnight. I am doing the boring revision with Mars/Snickers/Boost/Yorkie instead of fruits.
-To get myself alert, think that coffee cant help anymore, i move to Coke. And i finished 3 bottles in 3 days.

For the post-exam symptoms, think i might get to reveal them soon. But it will be much more healthy and interesting than this fucking life. I should say i will open my arms wide to welcome my normal life and start with some non-academic stuff. *cough cough*

Dang dang dang. See who is here? =))))

Hmmm of course i am not the most excited one. My unit is so so so happening, instead of the normal 4 peoples, it came to 6 now with 2 couples' fireworks explosive charge ! Sorry Maymay, I know your unit might be very plain and dull now. ;D

For the past few weeks i felt like i was some atomic bomb which is waiting to explode anytime soon. Maybe the stress level peaking high till the best friend also know it. And there she gave this song. 

I can only say that my heartbeat that time was even higher!

But thanks Jyun. 

I told mom that i have this kind of lifestyle during the exam period, because the time problems and your daughter is stupid and need more hard work compared to others, and she told me it was okay as long as you are not abusing alcohol. ( Since when la >.< )

People you can't live without

  

   I love my housemates,just as how i love my family. 

P/s: I like crapping non-sense sometimes, cause it wake up the stupid brain cells.

Happy New Year

If you ask me how i pass by the last minute of 2010 and the one minute to 2011, i would say i been surrounded by books and notes. But when the clock strike 12 midnight, it is undeniably that there is one force which push me walk into 2011 being in peace with myself because i truly know what this year had give me, and i know what  the year ahead will be.

2010 New Year 

My favorite quote for this year- Life isn't about finding yourself, life is about creating yourself. And based on that perceptions, i recalled what 2010 had given me back, trying to figure out whether i can still remember the up and down behind each memories and stories, or perhaps i should say how i embrace 2010. And based on the self-reflection, 2010 has been a messy and troublesome war, with not fulfilled destiny and the lack of passion to achieve them, splurged with unnecessary balance.

Before proceeding any further, i would like to say that 2010 has its own history and there is no right or wrong, every little count, the whole notion hardly affected by the imperfect, but the progress ad personal growth from it can be checked from the narratives behind each scar and experience. To me, i have spent some days talking to myself about the fears and shine, the good and the bad, figuring out whether i get to learned from the past. It involves stripping pass those cant reset button but going on with the check list.

I bring this up because i couldn't help but to move on. I admire the determination of some of my friends who set the aspirations and achieved the goals, nor it in what way. But mine can never be so no matter how i try hard for it. My years are like a typical student- feed on the books more than others. What i am embark on might be knowing trusted friend, where love and support posed, and guide me whenever i gone wrong. I started my A-level with a non-direction kid, just as any other who first left home. But these 2 years were the encounter one, and where i realised there can be nothing that i couldn't do, both academically or otherwise. My heart take me to where i am now, although i am still yearn for things that i cannot achieve and taught to embrace the university life which i fell in love with ,and  pretty much call this place home. But there were nothing which i couldn't give up to, be the only child in the family, i was cognizance on my responsibilities, and i know the inflection point. I felt trapped within the aspirations as I can no longer sustain it despite i want it.

I appreciate your love and friendship

But there is this saying, every exit is an entry somewhere. I swallow my pride and start creating a new one. I have a reset button in fact. But i know what to preserve, what to destroy and what to create.

So for this year, no new resolutions set because i know what to stop and what to continue behind each stories  , I will color the dream for sure.

Happy New Year!

Getaway

The trip to London at Christmas was great. London is a shopping heaven i would say, not so much on the scenery. It was a place that all of us fell in love with especially during this boxing day,with all the up to 70% discount. Very enjoyable ( esp when you can get the things that you demanded long time ago in a affordable price). There was no plan initially as where to start, but all based on the map, truly no constant on-the-go planning, indeed it was good. The most unlucky was the strike action which affected the train schedule, so mostly was walking around London instead using public transport. Truly exploring holiday.

Due to the budget, we searched for the cheapest hostel for accommodation, which explained the good and the bad. The hostel rewarding some good live show, which you can see the angmo making love anytime,anywhere, even in front of you. One of the funny incidence was to check out the toilet for their after used condom which is pretty hilarious. And without all these, the hostel seems to be a dead place,which i bet no one will ever want to stay at it again.

I was with one of the loveliest group of people which made the trip even more meaningful. So much of sharing, so much of laughter, so many hilarious and sarcastic talk.     ( I can know how Zicky likes to listen to people ML-ed in a toilet ).

And thanks everyone for making the trip a relaxing and enjoyable. It was really awesome. Now that i am back to reality. Reality like to sink in somehow. Exam are in 2 weeks time, but i barely touch the books. I cant seems to find the motivation.

The best part of a relationship, is getting to call the person, or lay down next to them, and tell them all the craziest stuff that happened to you all day long. In the end that's what it is about. It's not about sex, not about the money they give you, not about how much you owe them, not about how good looking,rich they are. It is about them listening to you talk for hours and hours and hours, about stupid shit that doesn't matter and all the crapping. 

Torn.Away

Once i have made decision and promised i will never let myself fall into the same situation and never let them take me alive. Apparently it struck and yet the dignity refuses to give in. The feeling is suffering. And the greatest is i give up when i push myself too much, in fact i found out that i actually remain silence whenever i discovered something that i refuses to know it. Suffer. Keep going. Sometimes, it takes just a little to remind how much i have. Yet, i always feel that the next day will surely be a beautiful one.

However, i actually find a rubbish collector for it.Perhaps i think her smile will just heal every moment to happiness. (sound gay) There were no one who would agree for her crazee sports routine. In fact, there may be reason behind. =P

                                                                      Jo Lene, the sayang angel 


A girl who let me waited for few hours, and get back to me with her drunken look and strong alcohol smell.
A girl who like to listen to EMO song when she is sad.
A girl who i get to know more at the end of sem 4, which is so not enough.
A girl who i think that deserve to be happy and can just screw people up because she deserve for it.
A girl who share the same thought and perspective of  l***
A girl who share her stories and secrets when they lying down on the bed together.
A girl that express her feelings deep and cry in front of me.
A girl that i can trust on ( you betta be!)
A girl who i gave a big hug when i listen to her speak.
A girl who has lots of romantic projections and fishing skills.
A girl who i know deep down that she loves me,and vice-versa

( All these came with a little bit of perasan-ess. Just a little huh)


In fact there are more which i cant scramble all here, and i cant bring myself to talk to her . I miss you darling.

Rambling

I could not bring myself to update this blog as it will made me realised how shit my life is. Shity is because with all the test going on, and university has been shut down three days for the SNOW. A good excuse for being lazy. Inefficiency. Unproductive. Uncompetitive. Insignificant life. In fact i see it this way.

People can lead their life as a lie, and i am forced attempting the answers. I guarantee you, it is better this way. And it's not the fear of knowing the answer, or i am incapable of loving because i can.It is just that if ever demand for a honest answer, you would like to know that you will be in all this pain. You chose not to know the fact and accept the fate.

There are a lot of things i do not notice. But when i take an observe on them, i will store them in my heart. That is an ideal choice for me.

I dont even know what am i thinking. Yeah the mood came again.

Tong Hua (童话) Cover - English/Chinese + Violin/Trumpet by Jason Chen & J...

How i wish i could sleep with my dream, and it turn up to be the real that i wish. But reality sink in. Ah... life! The days that filled with passion,motivation seems so far from me now, and i struggling to find them back. Faith lies. Blame on the winter sonata/ christmassy feel with singing fairytale of New York here.

Haha. Being lame again.

Note: I hope i survive through the week.